Sacrifice, Service, and Sanctification—Thoughts on Leviticus 10

All of the events in Leviticus 10 - the unauthorized incense, supernatural sudden deaths, seemingly callous and disconnected commands, and the various silences - take place during the same detailed, ritualistic inauguration of Aaron and his sons begun in chapter 9 that included blood on earlobes, thumbs and big toes, etc. This particular ritual was, as I understand it, a combination of public installation, the 'activation' of a set means for communal cleansing/relationship with God and a hands-on 'boot camp' for actually performing the various activities correctly.

In the midst of this critical learn-as-you-do process, with Moses providing the ritualistic instruction in much the same way he had assembled all the parts of the Tabernacle as he was shown 'on the mountain' (Exodus 25:40, 40:17-35), Nadav and Avihu decide to add an incense ritual of their own—one not authorized by God nor instructed by Moses. Up until this point, as the sons of Aaron, their role had been to assist their father, the High Priest. Their authorized duties had included preparing sacrifices and bringing the blood to their father to use in the various ritual offerings and ceremonies. Not glamorous work by any means, but much more than the average Israelite, observing from a distance, was allowed to do in the service connecting God and man.

Whatever Nadav and Avihu's desired outcome: drawing closer to God, highlighting their willingness to serve 'above and beyond' the mundane, or a desire to be the focus of attention like their father, the result is the end of their lives and service to God altogether. As the prophets would later state, God desires obedience even more than ritual sacrifice (1 Sam 15:22) As priests, their job was to draw the Israelites towards God—not themselves. Disobedience, in this instance, could be seen as a form of idolatry—placing personal desires or ambitions (no matter how pure or worthy) before God's instructions and sovereignty—results in 'alien fire.' Motives matter, especially in a place of public leadership in the service of God.

This act of disobedience—stepping outside the bounds of Divine orchestration through Moses—demands a response from God who desires that those near to Him be humble enough to accept the instructions He gave Moses. God's intervention in speaking to Aaron with the command not to drink while performing this ritual service may be both part of the shakedown training and a way on asserting that God rather than Moses is the source of these rituals. The rituals serve a Divine purpose and not human need for the Divine alone.

Aaron is silent in shock/grief, but like Job, also in his refusal to blame God. Moses' silence, and later anger, rather than comfort, reflect his understanding of God's power and judgment and the importance to not only Moses, Aaron and the immediate family, but to the whole community that this process for providing individual and communal atonement be completely and correctly activated. However, Aaron understands that this is - and needs to be - about more than rote ritual for atonement and connection with God to be successful.

Ironically, Moses' and Aaron's very different approaches to relationship with God (Moses stressing of ritual perfection and Aaron's focus on the emotional components) does seem to have created a breach in their own relationship.

I don't believe I've presented a radical approach by any means, just a slightly different nuance to this text. However, I do believe this nuanced reading can teach us valuable lessons regarding our own contemporary struggles with religion and spirituality:

• We need not choose between 'ritual' and 'emotional' fulfillment in our spiritual journeys or communities. Both have a role to play in our growth and connection to the Divine.

• A community that seeks to be holy, to serve the Divine beyond just self-interest, requires those who are passionate advocates of ritual and tradition serving alongside those equally as passionate about sensitivity to human emotion and imperfection.

• We can only be fully sanctified, reaching our full potential for service to both the Holy and the human, when we can accept others' perspectives and roles alongside our own and not see them as opposition to our own.

With gratitude to Rabbi Gary Creditor, whose Torah Study inspired this post, and to Rabbi David Mark for his input as I developed my ideas. I'm fortunate to count both among my teachers.

Life, Holiness and Community

LIFE isn't about 'what you have' 'where you've been' or 'the title you're called by'...
HOLINESS isn't following religious rules to perfection—the rules are the means, never the end...
SUCCESS isn't determined by what you've accomplished for yourself...

LIFE is drawing each breath, using each moment, in a way that makes the Divine evident to others (and yourself)
HOLINESS is being in a way that makes the Divine want to come near you, and those around you want to come near the Divine
SUCCESS is what you've worked with others to accomplish together

The GOAL is to repair the damage and fill the voids in the lives (individual and collective) around us by bringing the Divine close and shining Divine light on the broken and damaged pieces. The Divine light is not for us to draw attention to ourselves, but to keep focused on the need(s). Resisting the urge to stand in the spotlight is STRENGTH

COMMUNITY is holy, it's being like the Holy One
The Holy One loves individuals, but needs communities—large and small —to be fully present with us and sanctified in our midst
We were created, and are filled, with Divine life-breath, so we too need more than just the Holy One, we need one another—in all our diversity—as much as we need the Holy One

As we LIVE HOLINESS, COMMUNITIES that unite synergistically, are able focus enough of the light of the Divine Who is drawing near to usus, giving us wisdom, strength and hope to HEAL this world we have damaged. Achieving this GOAL sanctifies the Holy One in our midst.

The struggle isn't getting the Divine to defeat the Evil
The struggle is getting US to accept what LIFE, HOLINESS and SUCCESS realty are rather chase the counterfeit goals of possession, position, and power.

COMMUNITY is powerful. It doesn't take a large community to move a large obstacle or make long-term changes to society IF we keep the GOAL in sight.
HOLINESS is contagious. We are designed to respond to holiness and inspire one another to increase it.

If you've read all this and felt uplifted and inspired, don't leave without asking yourself THREE QUESTIONS (today and every day):

WHAT am I really living for each day?
WHO am I focusing the light with and on?
HOW can I increase true holiness in myself and my community?

It's TIME to make each day count and repair this world TOGETHER—Starting NOW!

[Inspired by learning with and from Rabbi Aaron Alexander, Reb Mimi Feigelson, Rabbi Shai Held and Rabbi Michael Knopf]

MOURNING

Some losses you mourn with tears and sobs
Some with community, closeness and memories
Some losses you mourn with silence and reflection
Some with commitment to transformation

Then there are the losses that are so profound
that mourning with all of these is still not enough

Karla J Worrell
November 16, 2014
In memory of Cantor Edward Cohen

Today I Am Reborn

Karla J Worrell
5 May 2014 / 5 Iyar 5774

Today, I am reborn
Acts of a human body
Renew an eternal soul
Ordinary becomes holy

Water and breath
Blessing and silence
Known and unknown
Past ending, future beginning

Today I am reborn

"Opening Beth-El's Doors - Jewish Disability Awareness Month"

Karla Worrell
Temple Beth-El Bulletin February 2014

When I asked if the SATO Committee had anything planned for Jewish Disability Awareness month in February, I didn't imagine the answer would include me writing a bulletin article. However, after ten years of participating in services, classes and events at Temple Beth-El with disabilities, I'm glad to share a few thoughts from that perspective.

At first glance, you'd see my canes and probably think that mobility issues from my Cerebral Palsy were my most significant challenge at Temple Beth-El. Even though accessibility is a consideration, it's been the disability that's not visible, and most recent, significant loss of sight from glaucoma, that's presented the greatest challenge to my participation in activities that I enjoy at Temple Beth-El.

The first time I leyned Torah was as part of Rabbi Creditor's Adult Bnei Mitzvah class of 2007, and I was hooked, increasing my skill and participation steadily. Then, just two years later, sudden and severe glaucoma left me with much less vision. I had to find new ways of doing many things in my daily life and in my davening and leyning as well. I was able to memorize many prayers, which made davening easier and more spiritual rather than a struggle. However, this wouldn't work with leyning, since the Torah scroll must be read. I wondered if I'd ever again be able to participate in something that was both very meaningful and enjoyable. I explored many visual aids, but they just got in the way. I realized that I could do readings from the bottom of the scroll's columns, but not the top. Then, Rabbi Creditor asked me to leyn the third aliya of Yom Kippur Minchah, which spanned the bottom and top of two columns. Though the scroll used is shorter than our regular Shabbat scroll, it was still a challenge! At one point, while practicing with Rabbi Creditor, he asked, "What do you usually do when you're having trouble reading?" From that question, the adaptations that have made me comfortable returning to leyning began.

On February 15th, I'll leyn the third aliya of Parashat Ki Tissa in recognition of Jewish Disability Awareness month. I no longer use the yad, but lean in close to the scroll. I also learn my aliya with more digital aids, including photos of the scroll itself, which allow me much more practice seeing the actual reading than I would be able to schedule with either Hazzan Marian or Rabbi Creditor.

It's taken many people's resources, ideas and support to allow me to return to doing what I love. When it comes to making a place for those challenged by disabilities, whether lifelong or relatively new, building accessibility is important, but it's only the first step. It's even more important that we be a disability-friendly community. Every person is different and deals with their disability differently. The best way to include someone, is to get to know them for who they are, and not just their disability. My passion for Judaism, along with many other interests, aren't a product of my disabilities, they're just who I am. It's not unusual for people with disabilities to keep their concerns and frustrations private. The best way to know what ways you, or others, can help is to genuinely get to know them. As you build relationships, you'll learn more about their challenges and needs as well. I hope, beginning with this Jewish Disability Awareness month and continuing into the future, all of us will work together to make Temple Beth-El not only accessible, but disability-friendly as well!

A Radical B'Shallach Question

As I read B'Shallach on Shabbat, a somewhat radical question took shape (WARNING: Sometimes my brain prefers to play in deep left field all by itself rather than hanging out in the infield with everyone else)

"The angel of God, who had been going ahead of the Israelite army, now moved and followed behind them; and the pillar of cloud shifted from in front of them and took up a place behind them, and it came between the army of the Egyptians and the army of Israel. Thus there was the cloud with the darkness, and it cast a spell upon the night, so that the one could not come near the other all through the night." [Exodus 14:19-20 JPSTanakh]

"Then the LORD said to Moses, 'Hold out your arm over the sea, that the waters may come back upon the Egyptians and upon their chariots and upon their horsemen.'" [Exodus 14:26 JPSTanakh]

"Shmuel Ha-katan said: 'Rejoice not when your enemies fall. Don't let your heart be glad when another stumbles. God may see it, and be displeased, and turn away His wrath from your enemy.'” (Proverbs 24:17-18) [BT Pirke Avot 4:19]

"And there went out the song throughout the host: R. Aha b. Hanina said: [It is the song referred to in the verse.] When the wicked perish, there is song; [thus] when Ahab b. Omri perished there was 'song'. But does the Holy One, blessed be He, rejoice over the downfall of the wicked? Is it not written, [That they should praise] as they went out before the army, and say, Give thanks unto the Lord for His mercy endureth for ever; concerning which R. Jonathan asked: Why are the words, He is good omitted from this expression of thanks? Because the Holy One, blessed be He, does not rejoice in the downfall of the wicked. For R. Samuel b. Nahman said in R. Jonathan's name: What is meant by, And one approached not the other all night? In that hour the ministering angels wished to utter the song [of praise] before the Holy One, blessed be He, but He rebuked them, saying: My handiwork [the Egyptians] is drowning in the sea; would ye utter song before me!" [BT Sanhedrin 39b]

"And he [Abraham] said, 'Let not my Lord be angry if I speak but this last time: What if ten should be found there?' And He [God] answered, 'I will not destroy, for the sake of the ten.'" [Genesis 18:32 JPSTanakh]

WHAT IF MOSES HAD REFUSED TO STRETCH OUT HIS ROD TO HAVE GOD DESTROY THE EGYPTIANS??? WHAT IF HE HAD ASKED GOD FOR DELIVERANCE WITHOUT DESTROYING THE EGYPTIANS?

How would God have reacted?
Angry at Moses for disobedience...?
Destroyed the Egyptians without Moses acting...?
Provided deliverance without destroying the Egyptians...?
Pleased at Moses lack of desire for revenge...?

Would this have changed our history significantly?
Would it have changed us as a people significantly?

WHAT IF WE MADE THE SAME CHOICE IN SOCIETY—NOT TO USE VIOLENCE TO END OPPRESSION (OR EXACT REVENGE)?

Would this change our history significantly?
Would this change us as a people/society significantly?

What Color Is Your Justice?

What Color Is Your Justice?

We often frame justice in terms of "evil vs. good", "black vs. white" Science tells us that the absence of light is called "black" while light is called "white" "White" light however, is the sum of all colors combined.

Some people, in their passion for justice, have a fire that burns white hot, doing whatever it takes inside the bounds of morality to achieve justice.
Others have a flame whose white light is flecked with black spots, bending and stretching morality out of deep passion for the justice they seek.

I am neither of these people.

Yes, I have a deep passion for justice, an intense empathy for those whose lives are shattered by the blackness around them. This intensity is deepened by my own disabilities and poverty.

I also have a deep passion for integrity - one that goes deeper than just morality.

One of the first things I remember learning with my Dad was Psalm 15:

1 A psalm of David.
LORD, who may sojourn in Your tent,
who may dwell on Your holy mountain?
2 He who lives without blame,
who does what is right,
and in his heart acknowledges the truth;
3 whose tongue is not given to evil;
who has never done harm to his fellow,
or borne reproach for [his acts toward] his neighbor;
4 for whom a contemptible man is abhorrent,
but who honors those who fear the LORD;
who stands by his oath even to his hurt;
5 who has never lent money at interest,
or accepted a bribe against the innocent.
The man who acts thus shall never be shaken. (JPSTanakh)

Long after my dad's passing, as an adult, I was told that this absolute integrity was a family trait; that the Worrell's are 'honest to a fault' This integrity is my inheritance, it's in my genes.

The passion to merge justice with absolute integrity is who I am.

I did a little research to find out if integrity was associated with any particular color, and found dark blue mentioned. (Not sure if it's just coincidence, but blue has been my 'favorite color' since childhood)

So, while for many the fight for justice burns with a white-hot all-encompassing flame, the holy fire of my fight for justice is a blow-torch of deep blue. My quest for justice is focused through the prism of Torah's "love your neighbor as yourself" and Hillel's "what is hateful to you, do not do to another"

Rather than wanting to use my voice to call out against injustice in every area and any way possible, I want to be a pure flame calling out the names of each and every victim with integrity and dignity. This is who I am.

This Shabbat, as we read the names of the children of Israel who went down to Egypt, found themselves oppressed and cried out for justice, I will be carrying many other names on my heart as well. May the Holy One hear their cries through me as he heard Israel's cries in Egypt.

The color of my justice is dark blue — what color is your justice...?


Karla J. Worrell
December 20, 2013

 In loving memory of William V. Worrell and Bonnie Clarke Marrow

With gratitude to Rabbi Aaron Alexander for his gracious support as I find new depths to my Judaism that I never imagined existed.